Just keep swimming...

One week, two near death experiences from Hank and I've decided that children are definitely not the best idea for me.   I CAN'T keep it together.  I didn't keep it together when the ants attacked Hank and he almost died and I definitely did not keep it together today...

Today started out like every other day, my alarm went off, I got up out of bed and started my bath water.  Made coffee and let Goose out.  Hank stays inside with me while I take my bath but I typically let him out when I start to dry my hair.  I let him out this morning just like always, Goose was waiting at the door for him and they both run off to take care of business.  I dry my hair and go ahead and start curling it, giving the dogs a little extra play time outside. 

I go to the door, dressed with partially curled hair, for Goose to greet me.  I yell 'Hank', shut the door, and go back to curling.  I finish my hair, go back to the door, [hello Goose], but no Hank.  A little worried so I go outside, check around the house, but still no Hank.  Panic begins, now!  I run all over my yard, looking in all the ditching surrounding my house with Goose being goofy as ever chasing me.  Like I'm playing here, GOOSE YOUR BROTHER IS MISSING!!! 

After about ten minutes of searching I go inside, grab my phone, take off my blue jeans, throw on some shorts and put on my knee boots -- and head out the door.  I'm going to search the rice fields!  {Note:  I woke Tiffany up at this point!  Called and woke Lori up, called Dad and Jeremy both to come join the search party}  I needed some help and God forbid something happened to Hank, I would need someone there to slap me when I want to drink myself into a coma for emotional support.

I'm running around behind my house searching, Tiffany stayed up by the house looking.  I'm probably 20 to 30 minutes into my search when I hear Tiffany scream, "I GOT HIM!"  I have no idea if he is dead or alive but from what I can see she is holding him.  I run up to the house [FYI Folks, it is hot at 7am, really hot!  I'm sweating and hoping that I don't have to reshower and fix my hair again.]  When I get to the porch there is Tiffy, holding Hank in a towel and he is soaked and muddy!!  She found him out in the rice field by my house -- he was buried up in the mud with his head sticking out of the water.  Thank God she found him, he would have died during the day if we wouldn't have. 

Cory and I talked the other day - It's like the awful movie Final Destination.... Hank has missed death several times but it keeps coming back!  I will now be a helicopter Mom, hovering over him at all times.  He is not going to like this....

So new rules at the Williams/Bullard household -- No dogs in rice fields, not even Goose.  No dogs around ants.  No dogs around trash -- they puke and it makes Tiffany sick.  No babies.

Amen.

Misconception #1

The first misconception of wedding planning is "It's all about you, it's your day."  Well, not really... it isn't all about you, it's all about everyone who is involved.  What they want, what they like, what they want and don't want to wear, what you should do, what is etiquette, etc.  To be honest it is much more stressful than I ever imagined.  

First stress... when you're parents are divorced it makes every aspect of planning anything much more difficult.  Lesson #1 -- DO NOT GET A DIVORCE!  It's hell on your children.  Who sits where, who walks down the aisle, who gets flowers, who gets invited to what, etc. etc. etc. 

Second stress... showers and parties.  Planning things with a large group of people is almost impossible.  I will be doing my best having me and Cory there and on time!!  Fall is crazy busy for the both of us -- so let's pray for rain on days that I need Cory in Walnut Ridge!  With that being said, I hate that people are taking time out of their schedules to do something for us -- I feel like it is almost annoying for some. 

Third stress...  Food.  Still food issues.  What to eat?  What to serve?  Full dinner?  Buffet? Just dessert?  Food is going to be one of the most expensive things that I purchase, so I just want to be sure that it is perfect. 

I think that one problem is that when you are 27 years old, you have been in a lot of weddings, helped with a lot of weddings, hosted a lot of showers.... and you kind of expect the same in the return.  Lesson #2, don't expect things from others.  You do for others because you want to not because you expect something in return.  I'm really working on that... and it's hard. 

Oh ya, wedding dress shopping... ya, there is a stress.  Stuff not fitting, too little, itchy, expensive.  Wew, that is still a decision to be made!  Lesson #3, stop eating.


Happy Tuesday, it's food day at work.  I want cheese dip all day.

Pre-Wedding Diet

So everyone knows -- you get married, you go on a diet... you want to look the best you can for your wedding day.  So -- here I am almost two weeks in...trying, but not really.  Skittles for breakfast was the perfect start of my day.

So starting today, I'm going go to go to the grocery store...and really try.  You know, that's the hardest part for me.  Between work and being between Wynne and Walnut Ridge it is hard to buy food, without it spoiling or having it with you when you are hungry.  So tonight I will buy food for my house, Cory's house, and work.

My Goals:

• Make healthy choices -  it's summer time, bring on the fresh fruits and veggies
• Work out, as much as possible.
• Tone arms, no one wants the flab in a wedding dress
• Order ADVOCARE!  It is time to start the 24 Day Challenge!  Take Catalyst like crazy, I can tell a huge difference in the tone of my arms and legs when I take this!
• Drink more water -- even though I hate it because I'm constantly having to go pee, it does make me feel so much better.
• Say no to candy!

Maybe I should have Tiffany take before and after pictures.... haha, no probably not.  I don't need her to have anymore ammo than what she probably already has!!  I will weigh and measure, that always helps me stay motivated seeing the numbers decrease... let's say I need them to decrease 10 or 20!

Skittles are my happy drug.  I say it keeps me from being a "B"



I may need a lot more than a bag today!

I like...I dislike...

Let's start off with... I like -- Cory, Hank, Goose, my friends and family, backroads, country music, Diet Coke, Spark, hot dogs, and cheese dip.

A few random dislikes I have...

• Greasy old man smell, too much 1980's cologne
• Skinny jeans worn by {too} big boys, let's be honest - boys in skinny jeans.  period
• White Keds, they maybe a classic but sometimes classics should be thrown in the trash
• Onions
• Toilet seat being left up (Thankfully Cory's Momma has taught him well!)
• Someone destroying the butter bowl, don't dip a spoon full out of the middle.  Butter should be flat.
• Lack of Manners
• A dirty bathroom -- hair on the sink, nasty toilet, pink mold in the shower
• Clothes being hung up in opposite directions.  They should face the same way and be organized by color.
• Socks not matching
• Having goosebumps
• My life getting crazy and me getting out of order, not being organized can almost push me over the edge
• Visors and Ole Miss
• When I'm busy and my phone rings...over and over and over
• When flowers die

 Take a shower, throw bad clothes in the trash, put down the toilet seat, fix your butter bowl, clean the bathroom, and organize!

Oh and if you own a visor, throw it away - if you love Ole Miss, I'm sorry.

That is all for today!  Woooooo Pig.

Attack of Ants

Friday night Cory and I went to Little Rock for a concert.  We stayed downtown at the La Quinta Inn downtown, since they allow pets.  We arrive at the hotel to see that there must be some sort of family reunion going on.  Needless to say, some of the kids were screaming when  we walked in the hotel doors with Goose.  Goose isn't even a big dog, he is a fairly small lab but it was pretty hilarious seeing these kids run away in fear since Cory and I both know that Goose couldn't or wouldn't hurt a thing.  That was pretty good entertainment. 

The concert was great.  Then Saturday morning came.

Cory and I got ready in a hurry, since there were fish to be caught that day.  I had my luggage and Hank on my hip and we headed out the door.  I decided to meet Cory down at the front of the hotel, so that I didn't have to walk as far with Hank and my luggage.  I walked outside of the main doors of the hotel and put Hank down in a flower bed to use the bathroom.  I knew he was probably about ready to bust since he hadn't went yet for the morning. 

He walks around, taking his time as usual, with me closely behind in fear he will run out into the road.  I noticed him stop and start sniffing and then something is in his mouth.  I run up, grab whatever that is in his mouth and get it out.  [It was a piece of hard boiled egg, I'm sure from the fancy continental breakfast served by the hotel].  When I get the egg out of his mouth I notice ants, several ants, on his face, on the egg, on his paw.  I wiped all of them off of him and didn't think much else about it.  A minute or two later, I see him shacking his head excessively.  I check him again, didn't see any ants or anything.. so I didn't worry. 

Cory pulls up by that point, I put Hank in the front seat, close the door and go to the back to help load up my stuff.  While I'm doing all of this I'm telling Cory about the ants and the egg.  We all the sudden hear a noise, like a squeaking noise...not like a gasp but like something is wheezing.  I instantly think HANK!  I run up to the passenger side and Hank is laying on the seat, all four legs stiff as a board and he is gasping for air.  I screamed and when I say I screamed, I really screamed... Cory runs to me and I hand him Hank.  He goes limp, we can't tell if he is breathing or not.  I'm hysterical at this point.  I run inside the hotel to see if there is a vet nearby.  I get a number and call them to find out they are full.  FULL?  WHAT?  FULL?  My dog is about to DIE! 

A few minutes have gone by, Hank is in the car with all the air blowing on him and Cory is petting him, talking to him.....  I'm sure Cory is begging him not to die, that his weekend of fishing would be ruined since he would have to take care of crazy me for the next week month.  I am fully aware of how crazy I was acting. 

We decided to get into the car and start driving, I got a hold of Maumelle Animal Hospital and they could see him in twenty minutes.  So, we were off!  In the mean time, I've called my vet - who told me that if it was fire ants that dogs can go into shock from the pain of the stings.  I noticed Hank had blood on his foot when I'm on the phone with her, which I discovered was several bites from the ants.

By the time we got to the hospital the little guy was perky, ran up to the door and everything.  They suggested benedryl and children's aspirin...so that is what we have done since Saturday.   Me being a helicopter Mom of course, hovering over him at all times, worried something is going to go wrong again.

Saturday was probably the most scared I have been, ever.  Sad to say that since it was just over a dog but seriously, I was thinking that the one constant thing that has been in my life for the past 7 years was about to die right in front of me.  Cory probably is second guessing marrying me since he has seen first hand how I react in situations like this.  I can't imagine would I would have done if it would have been a child!  Lesson learned!  Not sure that I will be prepared if that ever happens again but at least Cory will know I'm going to be psycho crazy. 

Later Saturday night, Hank looked like he had visited Erica at EMA.  He had some puffy lips!


Hank Williams is ALIVE!  

Goose and Hank at the hotel, before things went bad.

Smells like a Grandma's House

My house stinks.  Last week it smelled like a dead mouse along with mouse pee and poop.  This week it smells like moth balls.  Really awful, strong smell of moth balls.

Last weekend [before the engagement excitement] I cleaned my house.  Cleaned out the cabinets, cleaned as much as I could that could have potentially had a mouse in/on it.  I even called Lori and Peyton to come help - I needed all hands on deck for this project!  I also put out 12 mouse traps, hoping to kill all the suckers I possibly could.  {If you are all into animal rights and PETA...I would quit reading now}  Last Saturday there had been 7 mice killed in the Williams/Bullard household.

One of the seven have been killed since the moth balls have been placed in the attic and under the house.  I think it really did do the trick, the smell is so strong that a mouse would be crazy as all get out to come around my house.  I'd prefer to smell like a Grandma's house rather than a decomposing animal -- even worse, a decomposing mouse.

So it has been one week without a mouse.  Woooo!  When you pull in my driveway and get out of your car, be prepared that the smell of moth balls hits you then.  Don't worry though, once you get inside the smell [and eye burning] go away and you get use to it.

It's Friday! Time to see Randy Rogers and the future in-laws!

Kiss me in the dark!

One down

My mouse killer - at 12am

Notice bleach.

Hundreds of dollars worth of food, trashed.

I dream of cheese dip

This blog is mine - not about my wedding entirely, not just about me but my life and the people in it.  I created a wedding website to update out of town travelers on information, gift registry, and I also created two forms where you may RSVP and enter your address to receive an invite.  I'm a nerd, I know it.  Cory was pretty impressed I think yesterday with my wedding website that didn't involve a lot of ooooyyy gooooyyy mushy junk.  We love each other, we are getting married, boom - give me your address!  The website also offers a blog, where Cory and I can blog about how wonderful and beautiful the wedding experience is.  If you want the truth, check out this blog -- I know that no matter what at the end of our wedding day, Cory and I will be happy, be in love and so ready to start the rest of our life but -- boy this wedding planning is rough.  I wake up at 5am thinking about fabric and candles.  I go to bed at 12am thinking about flowers and cheese dip.  Yes cheese dip, I am hungry a lot these days from dieting.  This bride wants to be a tone and skinny bride - so I will continue to think about cheese dip and hot dogs...I can think but not eat! 

4 months really isn't that far away... I mean it's close.  Really close.  I want to have as much done and prepared before August.  The months of August and September are absolute hell for most employees of any university.  We are busy, students are acting cray cray, and with me doing fee assessment for the university -- I'm tired.  So hopefully, I can have as much done by August so that those months I can direct all my thoughts and energy to work.  PLUS I graduate in August, not sure about walking and all that.  Apparently my family wants me too...hmm, do you get gifts for graduating with your masters?  Hmmm. Maybe I will think on that!

Actually no, I probably won't - college graduations aren't that fun.

Check out our wedding website:


www.coryandalyson.weddingwindow.com


It is THURSDAY!



Oh - randomly, two guys (football players who had a bit of a darker skin tone than myself) walked by me in the hallway in the student union.  One whistled, one barked.  I was very confused.

I Said YES!

Back Story:  Cory and I have been back together since October, so a little over 8 months.  If you count all the time together, it has been over 8 years.  When Cory and I started dating again this time around we both kind of jumped in feet first knowing what we wanted out of our dating relationship.  I can't imagine marrying or having babies with anyone on this planet other than Cory.  [NOT that I want babies anytime soon, please see my previous blog]

The discussion of marriage had come up between us, we knew that we would be married, just didn't know when.  Most girls want to be married before the guy, they are ready to be engaged, plan the wedding, etc.  It's just our nature.  I really tried to stay away from any pressure of getting married, I know that Cory loves me and if you know Cory you know, he doesn't plan, he flies by the seat of his pants.  I've had friends tell me to dress cute, have my nails done, etc. since the beginning of May so needless to say by my birthday I figured it was go time.  I didn't believe that Cory could keep a secret from me, he wouldn't be able to have a ring and not tell me.   Apparently he had ordered the ring, had the ring...all without me knowing about it! 

So I was very surprised Saturday, when he popped the question!

Saturday I spent most of the day working in the yard.  Cory worked on some reports inside while I worked in the flower bed, etc.  I came in after a little over an hour of sweating to Cory on the phone, as soon as I walked in he walked out.  Needless to say, that didn't go over too well - I had been working like a dog and he was being Chatty Kathy inside?  [I didn't realize he was talking to my Daddy at that time].  We had a wonderful day though, he helped me outside, we ran a few errands in Walnut Ridge, went by his parents house to check on things and to see how the peach tree was holding up.  Cory had mentioned eating dinner at Skinny J's and maybe taking my Dad for Father's Day.  I had asked Erica and her kiddos to join us but I wasn't sure if she was actually going to come or not.  Also asked Stormy and her kiddos but she told me no, they had plans.  So, in my mind it was me, Cory, Dad, Lori and possible Erica's family. 

After a pretty busy day I decided it was time to shower and start getting ready for the night.

As I was trying on dresses, digging out jewelry to wear, I hear Cory talking to Goose.[We talk to our dogs like they are children, we know we are crazy]  He says, "Goose what do you have? What is that in your mouth?"  Well, if you have read some previous blogs I've had mice in my house and I just knew Goose was carrying one around in my kitchen.  From the bedroom I yell, "Get WHATEVER that is in his mouth out right now...what is it?"  I look into the kitchen and see Goose throwing something up in the air and catching it.  I go back to digging for bangles when Cory tells Goose again, "Take her what is in your mouth."  I again say, "If he has something gross in his mouth, I don't want it!!"  Next thing you know Goose runs in my bedroom and drops something at my feet.  I look down and it is a box inside a baggy [thankful Cory wanted to protect my ring box].

Cory walks in, gets on one knee....and well that's about all the mushy stuff he would want the whole world to know.  Needless to say we were both excited, shaking, and beyond happy that we were finally engaged.  Finally able to talk about our future plans with our families, etc. So - to celebrate, we drank champagne!

Cory then tells me that everyone is waiting on us for dinner, everyone that I had invited - including Stormy, she just lied to me to throw me off {stinker}.  I had to make one stop before we left for Jonesboro, so to Kellie and Derek's house I went.  Kellie knew already, which I wasn't shocked she hadn't told me, she is the best secret keeper I know.  Derek was talking about how grownup we are, babies, engagements... nawww we are still young and I will continue to tell myself that.

Dinner at Skinny J's was amazing, my family and friends loved my ring and were overjoyed that Cory will officially be in the family.  Sunnie said numerous times that he will actually be her Uncle Cory now.  {Note:  Sunnie has been "Team Cory" since day one so I knew she would be on top of the world when she heard our great news!}

We are still overwhelmed with the well wishes and excitement from our friends and families.  We have set the date for October 20, 2012.  Only 4 months away - time to get to work!

What's your pain level? Hell.

 The story of the birth of Caser Ward Smith - in the eyes of the best friend.

On Monday June 4th, I get a phone call from Kellie after a scheduled ultrasound.  She tells me that she will be going in the next day to be induced because she is low on fluid.  I knew that this wasn't what she wanted -- she wanted to have that baby on her own.  She seemed to handle her doctor telling her she was going to be induced fairly well, I'm pretty sure she was ready to meet her little man and get him out of her rib cage. Apparently your last few weeks of pregnancy you are miserable, with good reason!

So Tuesday morning came, I was a nervous wreck for Kellie, large bats butterflies were all in my stomach.  This is the first person that I have been so close to have a baby.  I don't remember much when Stormy had Sunnie and when she had Jersie, I had no worries since she was experienced in the whole labor thing.  So I cried, worried about Kellie, worried about the baby, worried something could happen to either one of them.  I was a wreck - maybe Kellie's hormones were rubbing off on me.  Cory reminded me that Kellie was the one pushing a kid out of her you know what, so she should be nervous -- I needed to be calm for her.  So I chilled out and went into work.

At 11 I get a text saying they had broken Kellie's water and she was dilated to 3.  My reply to her text was, "Did it feel like you peed yourself?"  In my mind, that's what it would feel like - warm water all over you at once while you are in a bed.  [Note:  Later I realize it isn't water]  At 11:45 they started the evil drugs, pitocin.  Around 12, I was hungry and heard that Kellie was progressing.  I was scared to death I was going to miss it, so I left work.  Arrived at the hospital - dang parking deck almost scared me to death.  I drove hunkered down like a 90 year old woman throughout the entire thing.  After arriving and checking on Kellie, I decided to have lunch with Kellie's sister, brother, and Daddy -- nice cafeteria food....hotdog and jojo's.  Let me say this, Kellie was hungry and couldn't eat, I felt so bad for her but I do know that she would enjoy a hotdog at any given opportunity too! 

After lunch I went to sit with Kellie.  Derek's aunt walks in, looks at me and says "And who are you?".... I refrained from being the typical Alyson that would have said, "I'm her best friend and if you don't know me then MAYBE you don't know her." but I didn't, Kellie jumped in as soon as she asked me because she knows me all too well. Sweet lady just didn't know who I was, I suppose.  The nurse came back in at 3:30 to find out she was still dilated to 3.  The sweet nurse would come in, ask Kellie's pain level and always turn up the pitocin.  The doctor used the words, "Fast and Furious" in regards to labor.  The hell with that.  That sounds terrible, who wants labor to be furious?  That sounds like a lot of stitches, a lot of pain, and a whole lot of blood!!  During the sitting around times I learned a lot on human anatomy....did you know that when they say they break your water they actually mean all the water around the baby - I thought it was a random sack that busted.  Nope, it is all the cushion stuff that goes all around the baby in your belly.  Who would have thought?

At 5 is when stuff started getting serious.  Kellie's contractions were getting a bit stronger and Dr. Sams came into check her.  He apparently didn't really break her water the first time but did at this point.  She was dilated to 4 - we are making progress.   This is when she was standing up trying to help her contractions, she was sweating, hurting, and in extreme pain.  It hurt my heart thinking about her hurting like this - so I sat in the waiting room down the hall and just watched her room.  At 5:45pm I see a nurse go in and two people with surgical gear -- ohhh she has decided for the epidural, another something she wasn't planning on doing.  Wasn't opposed but didn't plan on it - after about 30 minutes of pure hell, she said give me the juice!!  I would have said it before then  but she is a trooper.

She was tired but feeling much better with the drugs, I've tried to tell her this for years.  She was a little shaky but apparently a needle in your back keeping you numb from you waste down does that to you.  Better to be shaky than in extreme hell.  At 6:45, Kellie was checked again and still dilated to 5. At 7 we said goodbye to the sweet nurse that was so concerned with Kellie's pain level and said hello to the new demon sweet nurse.  

Kellie needed to rest and I was starving!  So, we went to Godsey's for dinner.  Brent (Derek's brother) made sure that I knew he was legal to have a beer and sweet, innocent Whitney (Kellie's sister) wished she could!  We sat down, I ordered a nice cold beer and he said - I was just kidding about getting a drink.  Who was he kidding??  - this has already been a long day and I don't joke around about beer.  We hurried out when we got a text at 9 saying that she was dilated to 5 1/2.  Half an inch = half a finger if you didn't know that.  Eeek!  At 9:50, checked and no change...and the nurse goes out of the room to call the doctor.  Bad sign!

Minutes later, they come in to say they will be doing a C-section on Kellie.  I went in, rubbed her foot [I forgot she couldn't feel it] while we all were very upset with the news.  This was definitely not in the plan of her having this baby.  She was swooped away at 10:00pm....and this is when I was really freaking out.  Where did they take her, why isn't Derek with her... I wouldn't have been happy if I were her... I would want Cory by my side the entire time.  At 10:50pm they come for Derek and at 10:54pm Baby Smith made his entrance into this world.

A doctor comes out to tell us that "Kippy as been born."  Please remember, we still do not know the name of this baby at this point.  Kiplan was an option but I had NEVER heard Kippy.  When he said that, Pam (Derek's Mom) looked around and said, "Kippy??? KIPPY??" we all were in shock thinking they had named him Kippy - not that we wouldn't love him but it definitely wasn't on my favorite list. 

We wait, we wait, and here comes the smiling Daddy with his beautiful baby boy.  He took after Derek, a bit of a cone shaped head but still one precious little sucker.  He weighed 8 pounds 4 ounces and was 21 inches long.  Derek was ON TOP of the world.
 
Betty asking nurse:  What did you rate him on the scales?
Derek: one hundred -- PERCENT!!!

Derek:  Hey, where is your Mommy I have no idea what to do with you.

A bath was given to the little guy, the baby not Derek.  He was cold, he cried, his precious little lip quivered but finally he was clean and all warm.  Kellie arrived in the room and made the announcement that his name is Caser Ward Smith!  I got home at 3:00am, laid in bed, and thought about the day.

Thoughts/Lessons Learned: 
*Don't have sex, you will get pregnant.
*If you get pregnant be prepared.
*Don't make a plan, babies do what they want when they want.
*Cafeteria hotdogs are amazing and much cheaper than corndogs.
*Your "water" is the nasty stuff holding your baby in your guts.
*5 1/2 inches is 5 & 1/2 fingers, which is a lot if you think about it
*Don't talk about being hungry in front of someone who can't eat.
*Standing up helps contractions, it's the gravity.
*They ask pregnant women to quit smoking after delivery to help with the healing...how about that?
*It's hard to shave your legs when your pregnant, see my first thought.
*Babies are beautiful, sweet, and are a gift from God.  Amazing!


Congratulation Kellie and Derek!  Caser is perfect!

Obsessed

I'm obsessed with monogrammed jewelry!  It all started with the famous "Carrie" necklace from Sex and the City back in the day.  She wore that necklace everywhere, lost it for sometime, but found it while in Paris - which was exactly what she needed!  It was simple and perfect.

Monogramming has never went out of style but has recently been spotted by many celebrities sporting their initials, their names, or the names of their children.  I really believe that you aren't Southern unless you own some sort of monogrammed jewelery, lucky for me, I own plenty!  I think that it takes a lot to be considered Southern but having something monogrammed is one of them!

Erica recently got me a monogrammed necklace for my birthday -- it is the acrylic monogram, not metal.  So cute.  Thanks E! [Please Note:  Erica is Southern, she is from the hills]

It looks like this but is turquoise

I think that bracelets with just the letter are just precious.  A Mom could get all the first initials of her children's name and mix it with bangles.  Trendy with a classic touch.  You could mix up the letters however you would like - I may get a A, J, and S {I don't have kids, it's either get Sunnie and Jersie's initials or get a H for Hank}  The more bangles, the better in my opinion; stack them up, mix them up, and wear them often!  If you don't own a monogrammed bracelet, check out Etsy.

I keep telling myself I should quit buying things with the W on it -- but lucky for me, Cory's last name starts with an M -- so I can just flip that W over when the time comes!


Happy Friday! 

AWR

Lint Licker

So, I have a problem.  Well let's be honest I have a lot of problems but one MAIN problem right now.  I have a mouse in my house -- ok, let's be honest again I have a lot of MICE!  

Stand off in the kitchen

I noticed the problem last week, a mouse was running around my living room while I laid on the couch watching tv.  Next thing you know it stands in the middle of my kitchen staring at me -- with his little mouse feet and his little mouse tail touching my floor.  Gross, so gross.  I forgot about the mouse after that night until Sunday...

 

Tiffany calls me and tells me that our dryer smells like rotten food.  I first wonder if I'm going to find some more toast or random food item (sausage ball) that was put into my dyer at one time or another. [idiots].  I then remembered this time last year my dryer smelled awful, I took it apart like literally took the entire thing apart to find a dead mouse.

 

Lint Licker

I got home on Sunday, took off the back plate and there he was, silly mouse got fried.  He wasn't near as rotten as the one last year but there was still blood and a lot of smelliness.  Luckily Cory was around to assist --he got me a Wal-Mart bag and gagged while he watched me get the dead mouse off the dryer.  [both of us with weak stomachs will be trouble one day]

I thought to myself -- well that mouse is dead, thank God it is gone and that problem is solved.  Nope, not so much.  Yesterday, I smelled something when I went into the laundry room, searched around thinking surely Hank didn't pee in here.  Then I found the stinky stuff -- mouse poop and pee behind my washer and dryer.  I went to get some cleaner out from under my sink to clean my laundry room and that is when the freak out really started......I pulled out the paper towels and what was attached to it -- POOP!!!  I have NEVER, I mean NEVER had mouse droppings in my cabinets.  My cabinets are new and I had no idea that they would be getting inside them.  But they did - it was under my sink and I was not a happy camper from this point forward.  SICK.  {on a side note, I have said SICK more times in the past 48 hours than I have in a long time}.  

I tried to clean as much of the laundry room as I could, dang those front load washer and dryers are heavy!!  I was doing a few things in the kitchen before I went to bed and I see a mouse on my counter!! 

ON MY COUNTER TOP!

Stop the music, it was on my granite which in itself freaked me out!  I called Cory (who was asleep) for him to tell me it was Nooooo big deal that I had a crazy mouse running around on my granite counter tops, that it happens when you live in the country and I just need to get a mouse trap and catch it.  Well, I thought it was a big deal and I was freaked out.  So the search begins, I dig out everything under my sink and I find a possible entrance.  SICK. No luck on finding mouse traps or glue traps -- at this point I'm thinking about getting a cat. 

I go to bed with my kitchen a wreck and so angry at the little suckers for trying to take over our home.  Luckily, Tiffany is a country girl and understands these things happen... but she thinks it is such as sick as I do.  [We will both call our Daddy's before this is all over with!]  Tonight, my plan is to CLEAN!  and KILL!  This weekend - my plans are to kill mice, replace vents under my house, stop up all holes getting into my house, and kill mice.  Anyone have a cat?  

Sick.

My kitchen right now - time to clean.  Notice the flower vases and the liquor bottles.  Maybe someone should send me flowers and buy me a drink after this traumatic experience.

Here kitty kitty kitty.....to be continued....

Redneck Birthday

My birthday weekend was redneck to say the least. A weekend away at the cabin was just what I needed. As soon as Erica got to the cabin we took off to the "boat shed" to set some yo-yos. Two girls, one mission - Catch some fish! When we realized there were rotten potatoes in the cricket basket we both threw out the lines, "it's my birthday no its my birthday" to avoid the touching of the rotten potato to get the crickets. We had a campfire, hot dogs, and Busch Light. Nothing short of perfect for me. Saturday morning I woke up to Cory saying - "let's take a trip to Mack's Prairie Wings in Stuttgart.". How he persuaded me was -- I'll drive, everyone can have mimosas, and I'll get you some sunglasses. Woooo I'm in!!! [Note: If you haven't had a mimosa. TRY IT!!!!]

 On my way to Mack's I call Jeanette, what a perfect birthday to see my Nette. She walks into Mack's and over the loud speaker they sing "Happy Birthday". You maybe a redneck if they sing you happy birthday at Mack's. After an hour of deliberation, I picked out the perfect shades that went well with my hair, fit my big head, and didn't move when I smiled and my fat checks bumped into them. Cory was probably a bit annoyed by the end of my decision but Hey, it's my birthday!

The rest if my afternoon included riding in the fresh, clean water of Maddox Bay. E had given CP a full description of the anatomy of a gar. The teeth, the fins, the gills, how they are prehistoric. Very educational for us all. She then went on to tell him about flying carp - joking - but there are flying carp in the bay. We have seen them several times over the past month or so. You should have seen his face when one jumped out of the water behind the boat -- he was shocked, stunned, and didn't know if he should jump into Cory's lap or jump out of the boat. He stayed in his seat with his mouth open for several minutes. It was priceless!

I looked up so info of a gar fish to share with CP, in case he cares.

*Basically unchanged since the days of the dinosaurs.
*Can live where many fish can't -- low oxygen areas
*They have hundrends of tiny needle like teeth that act as really sharp velcro.  OUCH.
*When you see them jump up out of the water they are expelling gasses and getting air in their "swim bladder."



To close about the gar - I don't like them, at all.  I am afraid they are going to bite my toes off or maybe even my leg. 

But the carp - I could handle those babies flying thru the air everyday if they made CP scream!

MAUI JIM!

Is that a flying carp?

Glad to know I scare my friends with my blog.. I'm a bit behind.  BABY SMITH HAS ARRIVED.  More to come on all those details!